Parental Leave Can Be So Unfair

I am on parental leave. It is pretty awesome to have the opportunity to spend nine months with my twin girls. I never have to worry about getting up for work. I don't even need to shower. Sometimes I do, just for fun.

 While I am grateful for our government giving me the opportunity to take a nine month "vacation" I have two serious issues with the system.

 Issue number one: Why do I, as a man only get to take nine months off of work, while my wife, were she not a freeloading student, can take a full year off with the girls? Why must life be so hard for the educated, employed straight white males in this world of ours?  What are those extra three months for?  Could it be recovery time?  As if it wasn't hard on me being in the delivery room.  I needed some recovery time after that.  I guess life just isn't fair.

Issue number two: There is no difference in the amount of time you can take off if you have more than one child.  I phoned EI and asked if I got any benefit for having twins.  They laughed at me.  I wasn't trying to be funny.  Imagine if Octo- Mom actually had a job.  She would only get one year of maternity leave.  That is nuts.  We only have two babies and I could really use two years off of work.

What if I just hid the birth certificate?  And then applied for a second 9 months right after the first one ended?  I could never get away with it these days.  Too many electronic trails I guess.  The 60's would have been easy.  But not today.

If a woman has a baby, then takes her year, and immediately starts trying to get pregnant, then has another baby within the next year, does she get to take another year of maternity?  Does that seem fair to you?  If you are still reading this now, you are probably insane, and have no concept of what fair is.

Or you are another enraged Dad.  Who's with me? Do you think we could sue the government and get our three months?